Welcome to Sharudin Jamal Blogspot

More than two decades ago, I was diagnosed of having a peculiar illness known as Bipolar Affective Disorder. My world as I knew it crumbled; I lost my business, then my job and later my sense of purpose. It was during this dark moments I rediscovered the joy of running and writing. Most of the articles here are about my rekindled pleasure of hitting the tarmac, my coming to terms with the illness and my discovery of the meaning of life.

I always on the lookout for inspirations to write in these three areas with the hope that they will shed new ray of hope to others who are in the same position as I am.

Do keep in touch if you feel connected through these essays.

Tuesday, April 16, 2019

16/4/19 FEAR - False Emotion Appears Real

In most cases we are living in a situation where what we fear won't actually happen.  In his book Stop Worrying and Start Living, Dale Carnegie wrote that NINETY PERCENT of worries are unfounded.  Much like our fear for snakes.  Only 25% or 600 species are venomous.  Yet the sight of any snake send chills to our spines.

Same goes with internet surfers.  Mostly are the general population who just wandering aimlessly killing time.  They are harmless.  Those who have sinister intentions will normally preselect their targets beforehand.

There is a difference between F.E.A.R. and danger.  While the former is just a play of the mind, danger is real.  For the past 20 years I had blasted my thoughts in cyberspace.  Honestly nobody ever bother me.  Out there almost everybody is busy with their little corner of the world to be concerned with what their neighbor is doing.  As long as you just mind your own business, you don't have much to worry.  It is a pretty democratic system.

The internet is like the movie Matrix.  It is an alternate reality.  It's not real life.  It's like Keeping Up with the Kardashians.  Nobody gives a hoot what they do.

So I can talk as loud as I want to without any fear that I am in danger.  I get to carve a little spot for myself in internet and everybody is welcome to view what I have to say.

After all I am a loud thinker.  That is one of the frills of being a writer.  I cannot simply remain passive.  I want to have a voice.  To be seen and heard.

The Zulus greet one another with sawubona "I see you."  The reply is ngikahona , "I am here".  It is as if before you see me I don't exist.  Same goes with me, before I write something, you don't know I am around.

During the 1999-2014 Cyborg War, I simply hit as many *[as] people as I know.  The results were  pretty dramatic.  Because this is a many to many game, I don't really know who will be effected and how they will respond back.  All I can do is reach out to the potential players with the hope they will play, according to their rules.

* External intervention.

These are the few outcomes from the effort:

It is a collective.  The systemic effect rippled to the various corners beyond my reach much like these models:

We are One and we are Many.  We are within God and God is within us.  Much like peeling an onion.  In every layer there is God.  All matters are intelligent and all matters are gods.


Thursday, April 11, 2019

11/4/19 The real power of freedom

Many think to be free you got to have a lot of money.  Actually the more money you have, the more restrictive your life.  You got to trade your time in exchange for the money that you got to earn.

To be free means you can do whatever you like at leisure.  Then only you can treat money as an enabler and not a jailer.

We are creatures of habit.  Even our purchasing preference is based on a set of habits that we had developed along the way.  Very likely when we have a lot of money we buy the same things.  The only difference is we buy the same things more or more expensive.

We either become collectors or hoarders.  Some buy more clothes and more expensive accessories.  In the case of Rosmah Mansor, she hoarded jewelries and handbags; same things more and more expensive.

There is no limit to material lust.  So lustful are some of us in material acquisition to the point we are willing to cheat, steal and kill for these so called branded items that make us feel good in front of others.  To some these items define who they are.

It is a sickness and we all are infected depending on the degree and the money we have.  I am guilty of it as well.  Nobody is spared.

The remedy is not about adding by rather subtracting.  There is no limit to addition.  However in most cases we can keep subtracting until we have the barest minimum which is eventually zero (very unlikely).  This concept is known as Voluntary Simplicity.

By opting for less, we become lighter,  Albeit we are talking about offloading our material baggage, Voluntary Simplicity also applies to the food that we eat and about anything we do to derive pleasure.

Everything in excess is bad for us.  So are material wealth.  There is such a thing as the Law of Diminishing Return; the more of the same thing we have, the less pleasurable the experience is to us.

This applies to everything.  It even applies to the most pleasurable things that we can think of, including sex and drugs.

The key is to have just enough so that you can sustain your utility.  No overindulging.  Indulgence will lead to suffering if we continuously persist; according to the teaching of the Buddha.

The case may be different if you are a hoarder.  You keep on buying because you are addicted to the feeling you get when you acquire the items.  Seldom hoarders actually utilize the items they hoard.  Rosmah Mansor cannot even use all the bags in her collection even if she rotates different bags everyday for a year (or more).

For goodness sake, the bags are the same design:

Certainly this is a serious illness.  This is beyond greed.  This is OCD at its worst!

So yes, we need money and yes we need to buy things.  However, bear in mind they are just that; things.  These things cannot help us when we are in trouble.  As a matter of fact, they are our liabilities when the chips are low.  You don't believe me?  Ask Rosmah Mansor.  Because of her lust for things, she and her husband Najib Razak are in the hot soup right now.

Things are meant to be utilized.  It you need things to make you feel secure psychologically, then you have a serious mental condition.  All the money in the world won't solve the deficiency of your mind.  You need to look at your values and beliefs real hard because your perception of reality had been altered.  The excess money that you have is just a sugar coating.  Dig deeper and you will discover a sense of insecurity or a feeling of void within you.

So I pass my verdict; Rosmah Mansor needs a shrink before she can stand a chance in the court of law.  Well that's just me.  No amount of jewelries and handbags will change my views.  The more they are displayed the more affirmative is my judgment LOL.  

For the lust of things... My o my.  Not a bit of envy.

The rebranding of Najib Razak as Malu Apa Bossku 
(literal translation:  why be ashamed my buddy).


11/4/19 Developing Mental Toughness

The mind is a powerful tool.  It can make or break you.

We need to flex our minds like it is a muscle.  What are the key ingredients to be mentally tough?

Firstly we must have a firm belief that we will succeed in any endeavor that we choose.  This belief in ourselves is paramount to strengthen our mind to propel us forward.  It exudes confidence and free us from any self-doubt.

Next we need to be in the State of Knowing.  We must trust our instinct completely so that whatever goals we set, we will achieve.  This State of Knowing is having faith that we were born to win.  No matter how challenging the adversity, we will endure.  Its a power deep inside of us that translates to the notion that we will make it no matter what.

Also, never underestimate the power of Unconditional Love.  I had experienced wonders after I finally lived through True Love very recently in my life.  Should I had it in my forming years, I would have gone much further in life.  It is never too late to feel empowered by love.  A healthy relationship can make you while a bad one can break you to pieces.

With Unconditional Love comes the feeling of certainty.  Nothing is achieved without certainty.  As mentioned by Morihei Ueshiba, the feeling of certainty cannot be described by words.  Move towards enlightenment.

Mental Toughness requires for us to be physically fit.  Nothing radiates positive vibes like an able body.  It is the body that influence the mind,  The mind is just a servomechanism.  Sound mind comes from a sound body.  It is the vessel that carries the passenger.  Without a healthy body even the best of minds falters.  If the body is the vehicle, the fuel is the food you put in.  You are what you eat.  No doubt about it.  Take good care of the body and the body will take care of you.

Finally, you need to be in an environment that is conducive to be Mentally Tough,  This is the Kung Fu part of it.  We cannot be complacent in our daily living.  Just like the coral reefs, the ones constantly exposed to the waves are the most vibrant.  If you look at the corals at the center of the Great Barrier Reef, they are pale and lifeless.  We need to challenge ourselves on a daily basis,  We need to be Sisyphus to be at the top of our game:

At the same time we need to have our hope high like Icarus:

The other word for Mental Toughness is RELENTLESS.  When the going gets tough the tough gets going,

Stay away from the naysayers and the small thinkers.  Their intention maybe good but they are normally govern by fear, uncertainty and doubt (FUD).  Those who are mentally tough are steadfast in their missions to succeed.  No matter how long it takes.  It is a goal driven action powered by passion and most importantly the belief that failure is not an option.

If you think this is pep talk or some motivational crap, think again.  Nothing great was ever achieved without the proper mindset.  Once you condition the body to excel, you need to condition your mind to carry though.  This is the foundation of Mens Sana in Corpore Sano or in Arabic, Al Aqli Salam Minal Jismi Salam; sound mind in a sound body.  We need both to move forward.